WE ARE ALL SLAVES…., yes, you too.
That’s a shocking thing to say, I know.
But I do have your attention now, don’t I.
Seneca, the Stoïc Philosopher, already said it in his Moral Letters which date back to the beginning of our Christian calendar:
“ Show me someone who isn’t a slave!”
We are all addicted to something, whether knowingly or unknowingly.
Who can live easily without:
coffee,
sugar,
a hot shower,
a comfortable bed,
a car,
a TV,
a smartphone,
fancy holidays,
other people’s approval,
gossiping, (I know: shocking! Isn’t it: but honestly, try to “not gossip” for a whole day!)
social media,
…??
You name it!
I hear you: I am not addicted, I just like it.
Okay, try to do without it for a day, a week, a month,…
Mmmm, it would get ugly, no?
All I am trying to say is: be conscious about what you’re doing!
Before you know it, it has become a habit and you don’t realize that you are doing/ having it anymore. ( which is a good thing for good habits of course but not for bad habits)
That’s where the word addiction,- being a slave to- comes in.
Break that chain of (bad) habits before it becomes too strong to break it.
Choose what you do very wisely and consciously.
Try to free yourself from needing things.
You can still have/do them but not in a way that: “without this I would be miserable” ( okay I admit: I am miserable without a hot shower, I am only human too :-), so yes I have my addictions too).
But you get my drift.
Try a day without and learn to appreciate new things.
Here are some suggestions:
– Have some tea, soup,…instead of coffee, you’ll be surprised by the effect!
– Don’t just take your car but ask yourself: can I go by bike, on foot, …?
– What else can I do tonight instead of automatically turning on the TV?
– Listen for 2/3 in a conversation and talk only for 1/3 of the time.
– Check your social media once or twice a week instead of everyday or a couple of times per day.
– Make it your goal to NOT gossip for a whole week! Yes! You’ll feel so much happier!!!
Here ’s interesting challenge for next week:
You can only speak in a positive way about people, events. No moping, no whining, no complaining,.. Even when there is a problem: turn your sentence around so that you ask yourself a question like:
What can I learn here?
How can we handle this?
Who is the best person to contact in this situation?
In the beginning you’ll find it very unnatural, you’re so used to talking in a negative, condoning way that you don’t realize it anymore! So everytime you open your mouth, think! Only positive talk! Yes, you can train your brain and eventually, you will feel less and less the need to gossip, to complain, to nag. And guess what, you’ll look at people, events differently, more positively, more openly. You will start seeing opportunites, solutions where before you only saw problems.
And the next step is to ‘contaminate’ your surroundings with your positivity!
You’ll notice that, when you react positively to situations and to what others are trying to drag you into, they won’t feel comfortable going on and on about how horrible this or that is. They’ll start – hesitantly of course, because this all new territory for most of us- wondering about solutions, about intentions ( we’re so quick to ‘know’ that others are out to get us, aren’t we) ,…and when you keep it up, they will too and you’ll have a whole different atmosphere in your home, company, circle of friends, sports club,…
That’s just one addiction, bad habit.
List what you really would have trouble living without ( okay, not people of course!! OMG! Writing a blog can have a nasty fall out when understood the wrong way, please do not misinterpretate me here) and try alternatives, free yourself before it’s become an addiction that leaves you feeling miserable when not provided.
Free yourself from your need for:
– unhealthy foods,
– smoking
– alcohol
– caffeine
those are the obvious ones, but also free yourself from your need:
– to be right all the time
– to get appreciation from others ( it’s nice to have but don’t be dependent on it)
– to know every single new item on social media
– to attend to everything you’re invited to ( that’s just your fear of missing out, your FOMO, talking)
– to win in every situation
– to be heard all the time (listening is also very rewarding, try it!)
…
Make your own challenges, choose a ‘partner in ( positive) crime’ and make it a playful event!
You’ll be so much stronger without those needs, fears!
Wishing you all a free, independent life!!!!!
Thank you so much for reading my blog!!
Katrien